A Love Letter to C-ute.

As I am sitting on my mother's terrace in Cape Verde looking at a mountain shaped like a human with a giant head, a tiny body and a boner, I feel very inspired. And what should one do when one is inspired? Write, of course. And what better to write about, than the wonderful Japanese idol group: C-ute (I don't know how to do the little round thing on the C), and their upcoming disbandment.

left to right: Chissa, Naki, Maimi, Airi, Mai

Here's a problem though - I hate writing about it. I hate even thinking about it. Why? 
Because I completely, with every bone in my body resent the idea that they, in 2 days, will no longer be together as the group C-ute that I know and love. This may sound very dramatic, and possibly somewhat pathetic, but hey - I don't control how I feel (that well, anyway). And I'm pretty sure mourning the loss of ones favourite music groups is a pretty common thing. So yeah, that's what I'm doing. Mourning. And how can I not? Anyone who knows the group, knows how wonderful and talented the girls are - and how amazing they are together as C-ute. Starting off in 2005, they proved how amazing they are over and over again - hereby allowing them to keep their career for a good 12 years (which is basically 80 in idol years). 

I, however, didn't get to know them until 2012 with the release of Aitai Aitai Aitai Na, and by then, they had already become the 5 members they are today. Before that, I only knew of Morning Musume and Berryz Koubou, and I have to be honest - after getting to know BK, I quickly learnt about the competition/hatred between Team C-ute and Team BK. And even though I didn't care much for drama (ahhhhh the drama), I just stupidly assumed that this war existed because the two groups were so different that you couldn't enjoy one and like the other. I then took that... test... that pops up every once in a while, where you sort out who your favourites are from each group and in H!P as a whole, and there I stumbled upon a picture of Hagiwara Mai in her Aitai x3 na oufit, and all I could think was "what in all that is holy in the world, how can one person be so beautiful." And so I looked her up, and found out she was in this mysterious "C-ute with a weird o" group that I had heard so much shit about. I think my initial thought was "ohoh, how can I support her, if I don't like her group?". I then decided to listen to their newest song at the time and OOOOhohohohohoh boy was I surprised. That song was A.W.E.S.O.M.E. . And the members - Top tier, every single one of them. I remember being so pissed of at the BK fans for "keeping me away" from the group so long (even though let's be honest, if I wanted to listen to them, I could have just done so - but I was 16 and pregnant dumb) that lost interest in following that fandom at all. I still loved BK, and listened to their music when it came out, but I stayed away from their community (picture a dumb girl being extremely judgemental about a couple of comments she read online and then judging an entire fandom for it ... that was me.. yay) 

 

Mai in Aitai Aitai Aitai Na outfit... she .. so pretty

It didn't take long from there for C-ute to become my favourite group alongside MM. With one awesome release after another, C-ute was definitely the group with the highest quality members and the best songs. MaiMai continued to be my favourite, but after a while had to share first place with Suzuki Airi. And while I never had much interest in Nakky and Maimi, the two mentioned and Chissa all ranked really highly on my overall favourite list- to the point where all three were in my top 10. I have, however, come to appreciate Maimi and Nakky lately, and I have never denied that they are incredibly talented girls. Including today, I have had C-ute written down as my favourite artists since 2013 - only one year after getting to know them (and in february!).
On top of that, after reading a Wotaintranslation.com article about Chisato admitting she was in love with Mai when they were kids, I was inspired to write my first ever fanfiction about the two of them, which later turned into being about the entire group and more. That story is now 26 pages long on word and ongoing. That's how inspiring they are. That's how amazing they are. That's how breathtakingly talented they are.

That's why it's going to hurt like hell when they aren't around anymore.

In the idol world there has never been a group like C-ute - and after their disbandment, there never will be again. They have everything. Every member is important- every member shines on their own:

Yajima Maimi

The face, the model, the inescapable beauty and the Leader.

Maimi is perfection in human form, and anyone who tries to deny it is lying. With her feminine, strong facial expressions and her slender, athletic body (that is very well known for her perfect abbs) no one can deny the godlike aura around this girl. To me, it seems that she is both the dream girl - the one you always want but can never have, and the last girl - the wife - the one you instantly know you want to be with forever. This is due to her mixed aura of being unreachable on all fronts, but extremely welcoming and forgiving at the same time. It's no wonder she is so popular.

Nakajima Saki

The dancer, the girl next door, the performer.

With her unmissable dancing skills, Nakky is undoubtedly the best dancer H!P has every had. She is all the best dancers of Hello! Project x3, with an aura around her unlike any of the others (the only one to possibly come close is, imho, Manakan). I personally think this is partialy due to the fact that when seeing her for the first time, you can't possibly predict her amazingness. I remember seeing her for the first time, and thinking wow - she is definitely the "girly" girl of the group who turns "cool" when she dances, only to have my jaw drop when I saw the character I had built for her completely destroyed. When watching her dance, "girly cute" and "cool" becomes two completely interchangable things - which leaves me in a constant state of admiration.

Suzuki Airi

The Ace, the talent, the perfect idol. 

No words can describe the perfection that is Suzuki Airi. She has the face of an angel and a voice that matches, only to be a happy, humble goofball on top of it. She kills me. She is the only idol I know who is perfect in every single aspect - but still feels relatable somehow. Airi feels like that helluva cute girl you have always known and been friends with who you one day find out is UNREASONABLY, UNFORGIVABLY TALENTED. hell, she, along with Mai and Eri, is the reason I figured out I was bisexual. It's a surprise to no one why she is the ace of C-ute and of H!P.  It's no surprise H!P is gathering so much talent at the moment so they all can get together and fill the HUGE-ASS-SHOES Airi is going to leave all on her own. Fuck I'm going to miss her so much.

Okai Chisato

The comedienne, the hardworker, the powerhouse.

If there was ever an idol who deserved everything she has gotten, it is Chissa. Never have I seen such dedication and perserverance in working your way into the front lines. Never have I seen such talent being taken for granted until she took matters into her own hands and made things happen for herself. Never have I been more inspired by an idol. Because FUCK if Chisato isn't inspirational. From being, quite frankly, one of the funniest members of H!P  to being an incredible dancer and one hell of a singer, this girl has got everything. She is the powerhouse of the group. The one who feels like it would be almost degrading to call her and "idol", as she fits more into the category of "artists". And holy shit if she isn't the only member in the idol world who actually fits the word HOT.

and last but not least,

 Hagiwara Mai

The attitude, the underdog, the extra spice. 

I have so much respect for this girl. She has been an idol since she was 6 years old. At SIX. YEARS. OLD. she had to sing and dance professionally - where I, as a six-year-old, had troubles spelling my own name. We literally watched this girl grow from being a chibi little thing with eye troubles and sunglasses, to being the fierce, beautiful girl she is today. To me, she is the most interesting character in the group, as she is - to many - the "bitch". She's the one who isn't afraid to speak out when something bothers her. She's the one who is the most open book of them all, wearing her heart on her sleeve. Everything about her feels like the last spice you put in your food to make it taste just right, and without her something is just.. wrong. She is cut-throat, in your face and I fucking adore her.

Considering I joined the C-ute fandom rather late, I never got to experience the three great girls: Arihara Kanna, Umeda Erika and Murakami Megumi - which is something I regret deeply. But I know someone out there remembers and treasures them all deeply, and if one of them were to one day read this, they should write everything they love about them. Because I want to learn.

As I finish writing this, I am a mess. I am bawling, snorting and all in all being really gross.
I really didn't help myself by listening to C-ute songs while writing this.. What was I thinking? I'm an idiot.

But to my dear C-ute, all I want to say is; 

Thank you. 

Thank you for your music.

Thank you for your dedication, 

for the smiles and the laughter you have brought. 

Thank you for coming to Europe, even though I didn't get to see you.

Thank you for caring about us outside of Japan.

Thank you to Airi and Mai for laughing at me when I stared at them at a train station with my jaw hanging at my knees.

Thank you for having existed

as indiviuals

and together.

C-ute..

Thank you so much for the last 5 years of my life.